Advice and Information
Integrated Model for Online Sex Advice
Here is the model around which my approach to online sex
advice and information is organized. It is comprehensive,
and it is unique. Others who offer advice through Newspapers
and women’s magazines seldom, if every, have as
thorough an approach to helping people to get UNstuck
from their sexless marriages. Understanding my Integrated
Model for Online Sex Advice will help you to navigate
our Members Section. 7-page article. 12/03
you a teen, looking for help with sex and dating?
We all know that Teens search the internet for information
on sexual behavior. In this important article I reproduce
a chapter from my eBook, Hopeful Solutions for Your Sexless
Marriage, in which I present a graduated model for growing
a relationship, including intimacy, commitment, and sex.
It is common sense – and I’ve shared this
with hundreds of teenagers (and new single people) and
they all find it valuable. 7-page article. 2/04
that Turn You On
Six common foods - some research claim these foods actually
“turn you on.” 1-page article. 9/04
can I stimulate my wife to fantastic orgasm through intercourse?
article was written in response to a visitor’s question.
He wanted to know how to make his wife scream with ecstasy.
Some husbands are like that, and some aren’t. 4-page
Older, and Still Willing and Able
30% of men ages 70 to 80 claim to have had sex 5 times
in the last 30 days according to recent research. Only
8% of women claim the same, likely do to being single.
Aging doesn’t have to slow you down. Attitude is
part of staying young. 3-page article.10/04
do women lose their desire for sex?
piece of advice was actually written to a Vistor who wrote
me, “How can I stimulate my wife to fantastic orgasms
through intercourse, and how can I get her to want more
sex? How can I get her to seduce me for oral and vaginal
sex?” Here are the 5 points I wrote him. 7-page
do men lose their desire for sex?
This begins to get at the heart of the matter. Over and
Over again you will hear me say that it is normal to struggle
with sex. There are so many issues involved, and it can
be a real challenge for any normal couple to find and
maintain a satisfying sexual relationship. Here is some
information and advice that should help you to understand
the challenges men face. 9-page article. 1/04
ways to do your woman
This might sound a little ridiculous, but the truth is
that a lot of men have one way, and it usually lasts less
than 2 minutes. More ways, for 22 minutes, and you can
truly hit a home run. Women, if this article makes you
warm up a little, copy it and talk about it with your
man. Men, 92% of the women in this world can have an orgasm
after 21 minutes of pleasure. Get it? 7-page article.
ways to do your man Amazing.
Who would have thought there were more than 2 ways? Well,
there are… and some guys struggle with any and all.
But, if you want to introduce a little more variety into
your routine… read this. 6-page article. 8/04
beyond your sexless marriage is worth $50,000
Some economists did some research on what brings us happiness,
and interestingly, found that sex is worth something.
The research and some commentary can be found here. 2-page
Magazine reports on sex and satisfaction
Consider the source… but once you get beyond this
reader survey you can learn something about what brings
satisfaction to the lives of those who read SELF magazine.
Maybe you will see yourself in the mirror of their findings.
3-page article. 9/04
Sexual Behavior ABC
Prime Time Live surveyed about 1500 people and compiled
this rather large pile of data. If you want to know what
“normal” is according to this survey, take
a look. Commentary along the way from Dr. Atwood will
help you to think carefully about the findings…
and your own behavior. 4-page article. 10/04
Art of a Good Blow Job
find it hard to do, and some enjoy it. Here are some simple
facts and techniques for what you might do after he has
pleased you for 22 minutes or more. 2-page article. 12/04
10 Struggles of a Sexless Marriage
Guess what this article is about. Yup, you guess right!
Here are the top 10. 2-page article. 10/04
Marriage Diagnostic Questionnaire
This questionnaire has been developed by Dr. Atwood to
help you to identify where you are struggling. There are
5 areas included in Dr. Atwood “Integrated Model
for Online Sex Advice” and this questionnaire will
help you to target the critical areas in your relationship.
In addition, you will identify the “7 Life Sucking
Symptoms of Being Stuck in a Sexless Marriage.”
Included in the 8-Step Program. 10-page article. 11/04
Dumb things to do about your sexless marriage
all can be foolish at times. Here are the most common
foolish things people do in order to get UNstuck from
their sexless marriage. These are “normal”
behaviors, but ineffective behaviors. Maybe you can see
yourself here. 4-page article. 11/04
patch Intrinsa undergoing more research
Well, there still isn’t a miracle pill for women.
The side effects seemed to be too much for FDA approval.
But, you will learn something important about the “placebo
effect.” 3-page article. 9/04
can’t she have an orgasm during intercourse?
Five simple points to be made here that can help either
him, or her, to get on with it. Remember, 92% of women
can have an orgasm after 21 minutes of pleasure. How?
2-page article. 11/04
often do married people normally have sex?
We are always comparing ourselves to others. Here is the
answer to this question. 1-page article. 4/04
sex therapy work?
Six Suggestions for making sure the answer is “YES!”
2-page article. 4/04
do so many people want self- help?
Seven reasons. Dr. Atwood offers a sentence or two that
gets at the heart of the matter for each reason. 2-page
on Sex and Aging 9
page dialogue between William Martin (Author featured
by Oprah) and Dr Andrew Atwood. 2/04
Truth about Sex and Aging
Initiated by an an entry in our Discussion Forum, this
article is actually a dialogue between Dr. Atwood and
William Martin, author of The Couples Tao Te Ching. Do-be-do-be-do!
9-page article. 1/05
like Medicare will pay for Viagra!
There could be a great financial savings
for you if you qualify.
and Energetic Challenges
God, Oh God, Yes, Yes!
Every wonder why so many people gleefully shout this same
exclamation at the point of orgasm? And have you ever
wondered about the presence of something Devine at the
moment of orgasm? Is it a small taste of Oneness? 2-page
- the body’s internal energy centers - an orientation
An introductory article to the body's 7 energy centers,
and how they align with other developmental models. Closed
Chakras are not helpful, while open Chakras are.
3-page article. 1/05
- The Root Chakra
– The Sacral Chakra
– The Solar Plexus Chakra
- The Heart Chakra
– The Throat Chakra
– The Third Eye Chakra
– The Crown Chakra
and Sex - the good, the bad, and the ugly Coming
drug boost women’s sexual desire
is another one of those “magic pills” that
the pharmaceutical companies are working on. This one
works in rats… so maybe it might work in women.
That seems to be the assumption anyway. 2-page article.
– painful intercourse
For the small number of women who are afflicted
with Vaginismus, enjoyable sex is out of the question.
Here are 10 considerations – pieces of information
and recommendations – that can give you some encouragement
and direction. 3-page article. 8/04
Inhibition – What’s wrong?Called
by different names, the struggle is the same: when a guy
can’t get it off, he is in trouble. Take a look
at the role of masturbation, anxiety, religious inhibitions,
reasons why we blame her, and rushing too much. 3-page
Inhibition – What can be done?We’ve
all seen the ads on TV for Livitra, Cialis, and Viagra.
There are also Kegel Exercises for her. And Masturbation
abated? A handful of tips. 3-page article. 9/04
Viagra for Women?
It’s called “Hypoactive Sexual Desire Disorder”
– when a woman doesn’t want sex, or has no
desire for sex. Various drugs have been tried, and some
have worked. Herbal supplements as well. 2-page paper.
sex may reduce prostate cancer risk
of a news story from the Journal of the American Medical
Association. 2-page article. 5/04
patch (Intrinsa) revs up sex life after menopause
are two articles from the news media, reproduced for you.
Both were press releases from Proctor and Gamble about
Intrinsa before the drug went to the FDA. The Press can
be misleading… can’t it? Does help with understanding
the process, and the role of testosterone. 4-page article.
in pre and post menopausal women A
succinct statement about the role of testosterone around
menopause. One of the very real physical changes that
takes place, naturally, among
– good news, bad news, new news Can’t
do too well without it, but putting it in your system
unnaturally seems to be a problem. Link for help included.
2-page article. 8/04
linked to love of chocolate
Reprint of an article that appeared in the London Times.
God, I hope this is true! 2-page article. 11/04
the size of a man’s penis matter? 12
points to consider when you think your pointer is too
small. Facts, my friend, which will point you in the right
direction. 2-page article. 11/04
can’t she have an orgasm? 5
issues to look at, given in response to a vistor’s
question. Very few women can’t have an orgasm. Very
few haven’t, either. But there are some. Most are
stuck somewhere. 2-page article. 12/04
Sexual Desire Depressed by Depressants? SSRIs
are a life-saving medication for those who are depressed,
but they come with some negative side effects. Check it
out here, then talk with your Doc. 3-page article. 12/28/04
herbal breast enlargement programs reasonable?
Common sense advice when considering these
commonly advertised products.
2-page article. 1/05
John’s Wort is at least as effective in treating
New research supports the efficacy of this herbal treatment
for depression. If it works for you, it also doesn’t
have the nasty side effects associated with a loss of
2-Page Article 2/05
can we put the romance back in our relationship?
There are two directions to go with romance – backwards
and forwards. One is toward enmeshment and the other is
towards differentiation. Which is which, and why is one
better than the other? 3-page article. 11/04
partner is bossy and I don’t like it
3 pages of tips on how to get yourself separate from this
potentially critical situation before it is too late.
Nip this one in the bud! 3-page article. 10/04
do I confront my partner? In
this 10- page eGuide, Dr. Atwood coaches the reader on
how to confront effectively. This article was written
in response to a visitor’s question about how to
confront his overweight wife. In a Q and A format, you
will surely find this guide to be helpful. 11-page article.
relationship suffering from the curse of good?
Originally published in The Healing Garden Journal, this
article was written for those who are stuck in a relationship
that is really good, but not hot – passionate –
or wet. If yours is a nice relationship that has you bored,
then read this article. 3-page article. 8/04
reasons why great marriages are great friendship Yes,
7 reasons. Short, sweet, and to the point. 2-page article.
yourself, and Your Partner
This is an introduction to the eCourse Dr. Atwood has
developed that helps you to identify your “type”
according to the works of Myers and Briggs. Many of you
are familiar with the Myers-Briggs Type Indicator. Well,
this isn’t it. Rather, this is an intro to the eCourse,
“How to know who you are, and be who you are”
which you can find in our Catalogue. 7-page article. 8/03
secrets to a better love life In
6 pages you will find 10 very practical tips about how
you can put some goodness into your relationship. There
may be nothing here that you don’t know, but there
probably is something here you have forgotten. Good things
to do that will bring goodness into your relationship.
6-page article. 9/04
husband won’t talk with me. What am I supposed to
is a dance that two people can get into and it involves
one being a distancer, and the other being a pursuer.
In this case, she pursues and he distances. How to stop
it? Read on. 3-page article. 2/04
spouse is involved with another person
This is a big one. A really BIG on. Take a look at this
article and you will be directed to a website that has
a tremendously helpful resource with ample free help.
Link to another site. 9/03
are fighting over money Most
fights are born of the same issue – a profound lack
of teamwork. Here are five steps that will give you concrete
help regardless of the problem around which the two of
you are struggling. 4-page article. 1/04
have drifted apart and our sex life is lousy Four
very real issues are look at in brief. These are pretty
common issues that stand alone in this short article.
A quick look might well be worth your while. You might
recognize yourself. 3-page article. 3/04
partner keeps threatening me with divorce Here
is a pretty pointed article that is directed at this unfortunate,
yet common problem. Dissect the issue and get beyond the
dilemma that is presented by the threat, counter-threat,
merry-go-round. 3-page article. 5/04
partner is gone too much of the time Using
the 4 major types of people presented in Dr. Atwood eCourse,
see if you can figure out why each type is gone too much
of the time. Look at the Ready Adventurer, the Loyal Caretaker,
the Authentic Idealist, and the Careful Thinker. 2-page
partner’s parents are in our lives way too much
of the time Once
gain using the 4 types developed by Myers and Briggs,
Dr. Atwood offers some advice on this critical problem
of enmeshment. Too many people in your space can be a
real problem. 3-page article. 6/04
husband doesn’t pay attention to the kids What
are the issues for fathers of different temperaments?
And what is the likely control issue that is hidden in
this challenge? Take a look. 2-page article. 3/04
partner is abusing alcohol and I don’t know what
to do This
is, admittedly, a short article on a big subject. Look
for more details elsewhere, but for now, take a look at
how you might respond to each of the 4 major types of
people. 2-page article. 4/04
has spun out of control with anger and defensiveness
Actually, the question that was written in was this: “We
have spun out of control and are about to divorce. What
do I do now that our relationship has spun out of control
and deteriorated to the point that there is just about
nothing left between us?” Unfortunately, lots of
relationships do spin out of control. Here are four actions
you can take. 3-page article. 3/04
of us is supposed to lead around what?
are 7 suggestions for you to consider. It is common for
partners to get confused about their roles, and to do
so inevitably leads to conflict. Follow these suggestions
and you can greatly reduce the conflicts between the two
of you. 3-page article. 4/04
are in conflict over the kids There
can be a great deal of conflict around children. Different
types of kids, as with different types of parents, can
present unique challenges. This 4 page paper takes a look
at critical issues… and as usual, offers practical
advice. 4-page article. 4/04
people can schedule time for an affair,
they should be able to schedule time with their spouse!Seems
logical doesn’t it. Making time for a date is the
topic here. 1-page article. 12/04
Love: Letting Yourself be Loved
Here is a good book about the art of allowing your self
to be loved. This is truly a challenge for a lot of people
who for one reason, or another, struggle with receiving
love. 1-Page Article 1/05
your family a Greenhouse? This
article, which first appeared in The Healing Garden Journal,
talks about the family as a place where life can grow.
2-page article. 7/04
Secrets Control Us The
subtle influences of our culture dictate what is “right”
from what is “wrong” behavior. Our attitudes
are influenced by our culture. Our sexuality is influenced
by our culture. Here are 7 truths that expose the power
of your culture and its ability to control you. 3-page
do Muslim Women Wear a Jilbab
Cultural differences are at work in the
way we dress, and the way we behave. Sex in the City?
They dress differently there. 1-Page Article 1/05
Personal Emotional and Mental Challenges
to effectively manage your frustration Short
and to the point, but a critical reframe of the role and
function of frustration. Dr. Atwood teaches this model
to his clients all the time – comes from Reality
Therapy. 2-page article. 2/04
to get more pleasure Freud
talked about the pleasure and pain principles. Which drives
you? 2-page article. 3/04
power of attention and intention There
is great power in putting your attention on the right
intention. Most accomplishments in life come from this
simple activity. 1-page paper. 8/04
you can spot and manage a mid-life crisis
Six actions you can take once you spot the mid-life crisis
that has arrived in your life. 2-page article. 10/03
six basic needs that you and your partner have in common
two of you share these 6 in common. These are needs, not
wants. Help your partner to feel satisfaction at these
6 points of need, an you will be valued. 2-page paper.
can I do about my low self-esteem in my sexless marriage?
is just such a huge issue. Here, in Q&A format, Dr.
Atwood gives some detailed suggestions to an imaginary
visitor (who is a composite of some who have emailed)
about the loss of worth… and how to get it back.
5-page article. 10/03
to have reverence for yourself, and your lover Dr.
Atwood recalls Dr. Schweitzer. The central principle of
one’s life can give direction to all of us. 2-page
does sex seem like so much work? Here
is what a man can do, and what a woman can do, when this
all seems like just too much work. 2-page article. 9/04
emotional foundation to great sex
Truth is, this is the emotional foundation to great living.
Here is a book review of How Full Is Your Bucket? Positive
Psychology is an emerging field and Dr. Atwood takes a
look at the benefit of focusing on strengths. 3-page Book
Prime Time Life news shoe reported on the sexual behaviors
of Americans, and Dr. Atwood has pulled some of the research
out around the subjects of fantasy, and activity. Who
fantasies about what, and who actually does what? 4-page
to swim to shore when the boat is sinking, or sunk
This actually is the 8th step in the 8-Step program you
can find at Hopeful Solutions. Divorce – legal,
emotional, physical – along with a chapter from
Dr. Atwood’s eBook, You Can Save Your Marriage.
How to save yourself regardless. 10-page paper. 11/04
is it time to throw in the towel? Different
types of people respond to “the end” differently.
Over the years Dr. Atwood has gathered some common sense
from observing others and he shares it here. 3-page article.
do I decide about an abortion? This
article isn’t so much about abortion as it is about
the process of decision making. Some decisions are really
tough, and it is important to look at all 4 quadrants
when making the decision. 2-page article. 3/04
cheated on my spouse and I feel miserable
Here is an outline, literally, that you can follow to
work yourself through and out of the situation you are
in. 4-page outline. 4/04
a marriage exist without sex? Why
would the answer be “yes?” 3-page article.
a woman and I want to know how I can increase my sexual
There are, once again, so very many issues that can be
involved in a lack of sexual desire. Dr. Atwood visits
his Integrated Model for Online Sex Advice and gives direction
toward the answer that might be right for you. 3-page
among obese people is sometimes good, sometimes not
When you are obese you make certain adaptations in order
to live well. One adaptation might well be to simply desire
sex less. After all, if you don’t want it you don’t
get so frustrated when you don’t have it. A sad,
but understandable adjustment. 2-page article. 12/04
doesn’t oral sex turn him on? In
response to an email, Dr. Atwood proposes an answer to
this rather odd, but real question. 2-page article. 10/04
depresson a critical factor in a woman's sexual desire?
A general look at the web that symptoms,
causes, and treatments can weave. The net result can be
a tangle of challenges, all of which may result in lowered